Macaron Quest

▲ That's a really ugly thumb.

I must satisfy my craving to master creating the most perfect macaron. And yes it is spelled with only one "o". 17 dollars, three tries and one wannabe pistachio success later, I still have not fully succeeded. But at least they taste mouth melting delicious! I have learned more today about macaron baking in the last few hours than I ever have spent on countless computer hours searching for a better recipe. Macarons are simple at their best, but they have quite a finicky nature. One small mistake and they turn into a mold of ugliness leaving you discouraged and with one less egg no matter how great your recipe is. But practice I will and try again I shall despite the wasted eggs and determination. At least I find lovely new music along the way.

‎"I don't like buttercream. I don't like this mixture between butter... and sugar... it just tastes like... sweet fat." Baking meter is on high. Dulce delight how you inspire me.

Happy Ghoulings

How was your weekend? Oh my weekend was fine. I just don't remember it. And I don't mean I got crazy drunk and forgetful, I just mean my weekend was good enough to be fun in the moment, but not memorable. Does that mean my weekend sucked?

Saturday- Costume making and putting my sharpie skills to the test.



Sunday- Two year anniversary with the Supafob at Griffith LA Hayride Haunt. Despite the creepy atmosphere and unexpected frights, the scariest part was walking back to the car.. through the foggy woods at night.. with no lights to shine your way.. and hearing distant screams in the background.. Fun fun fun nonetheless!



Monday (Halloween) Nutella costume = fame, glory & beautiful bag of candy


Update: My mother scheduled my wisdom tooth appointment for Dec. 17th (the first day of winter break). This concludes a winter slumber of chipmunk cheek swelling, consuming nothing delicious, and pain. Well... at least I get to go to the Young the Giant concert the day before. I give myself that much before I subject myself to two weeks of tormentous gum-healing. I don't think I will give up snowboarding though. Chipmunk cheeks or not.

Indecision

I don't like to answer the question of how I am doing. Such a simple question. But its like a crossroads answer. If you tell them "yes, Im good" then the other person will think you are good and will leave you be. Whereas on the other hand, if you tell them the truth, "No I am not okay, I am far from okay." They will respond with concern and bother you and ask what is wrong when all I want to do is curl up in a ball a disappear and not be bombarded with these stupid questions that wont help me at all. I should just lie and avoid everything. But it just takes so much effort to keep being fake happy. Dammit.

Let’s stop saying we’re fine

We all want to know, how it ends.

Oh, happily ever after, wouldn't you know, wouldn't you know.
Oh, skip to the ending, who'd like to know, I'd like to know.
Author of the moment, can you tell me, do I end up, do I end up happy?

"You know that feeling, when you can actually feel your heart breaking. Like the only solid thing inside you that is keeping you sane, is slowly tearing apart? And when you know your going to cry, and your cheeks start to feel hot, and you start to shake and then the tears come, and they dont stop. And its almost like your body has lost control and you just cant feel anything anymore. Your numb. And empty. And cold. And you cant fix it, the truth is, no one can. And now your stuck, feeling like a mess and wanting to just die right there and then, but no one knows this and no one cares, because your alone. And you always will be."

Curse weekday holidays

Can I just skip school on this Halloween so I can spend all day adventuring for 90% off sales and then spend the rest of the day getting free candy in my cool beans Nutella costume?